Ben’s official nickname; Constant Human Contact Baby. Dear god, someone help us. 

Mike and I are not baby holders. We love babies but we love them in their swing and in their crib and on the play mat. We like to hold babies when it is time for them to eat or when we are in the mood to snuggle them (which is a lot but not all the live long day.) Nate was all for this type of parenting he was easy-going and mellow. Ben? HAHAHA! OMFG WHERE IS THE VODKA?  You have to hold him, it’s not up to us, it’s up to him and he will remind my in 2 seconds flat that he is in charge. He has about two hours per day where he is content, one period in the morning and one in the evening, the rest of the time he is one whimper away from a total meltdown.  Except when we are out of the house, he loves outside, a moving car and shopping. We get out a lot becuase the day is just easier that way. Except that it’s not because he’s 8 weeks old and up 3 times a night to eat so getting out is sort of like a zombie field trip.

He has to be held. I fought it for weeks until he finally broke me when I couldn’t take the screaming one more second and strapped the little stinker to my chest where he’s pretty much been since then. I do everything with him either in my arms or in the bjorn (again, thanks metabolism for completely disregarding this!) while I’m adjusting to it I hate it. I just want to use the darn bathroom without him. It’s driving us a bit crazy. I keep testing him, putting him in the swing  for little periods, or in his bouncer and it seems like he will be fine and then, whaaaaa.  It’s making Nate a bit nuts, too, he’s acting like it’s a noise contest and just yells over the top of him and that’s as relaxing as you’re imagining.   But then there are those two good hours and all is right with the world.  I can’t get enough of happy Ben though I love CHCB, I really enjoy happy Ben. I feel guilty for being frustrated and while I melt as soon as I pick him up and instantly he feels so good and I love having him in my arms (because he shuts up immediately) I just really hope this doesn’t last for ever, I want my left arm back and to stop driving extra laps around our block . I’d like to have a relaxing day at home where he can be put in his swing long enough for me to load the dishwasher or fold some laundry.  I want to pick him up because I can’t resist him, not because he’s crying again. This wont last forever, right?


5 thoughts on “CHCB

  1. No, it doesn’t, but that doesn’t make it better today!!! Hola had to be held because he’d spit up if I set him down anywhere, anytime.

    I never used his quilt that came with his bedding. It’s all I ever used with Rt. What a difference a kids makes, dammit.

    However, in the beginning, Hola didn’t like the car. Luckily it was very short lived, but I do recall driving around eating my OWN happy meal (no one else got any) while Hola screamed bloody murder and the other kid did something annoying as well. Only time I was going to be able to eat!

    Plus, you have the kid who was born early. Sometimes they have a harder time outside the womb. He could be a 4th trimester baby along with coming out during the 3rd trimester.

    Have you tried a peanut shell type thing? It helped me with my back…

  2. Oh, that was Eli to a T. And he was a tiny one as well, so maybe that’s part of it? Let me just put it this – we owned SEVEN baby carriers. It got better, it really did, but it took awhile. And he also hated the car. Uh, the Moby saved my life, and my house was really really dirty. I wish I had better advice! I wish I could come over and hold that baby or feed you guys! But instead I can just tell you – it does get better, it does!
    Also, my other piece of advice – he WOULD consent to be put down in the bouncer on top of the running dryer, so you can always try that!

  3. Clara was that way and she refused to go into a sling or ergo. I could put her in the swing for 3-5 minutes, but that was it. There were months where Tom & I had to take turns eating dinner. Once she began to be able to move on her own, it ended. (interestingly, she was always an angel at day-care, just contributing to mommy guilt). It is now a very distant memory! See you soon!

  4. I had a full contact baby too. I think that’s why it took me so long to think about having another one. The Bjorn was my best friend. Like Becky above, I remember taking turns eating dinner, and like Elizabeth, my house was a mess. But it didn’t last forever. And now I miss having a baby to hold… It will get better.

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