Night One: Fail

I had been looking forward to this night for months.   No more pumping, I could go to sleep when I was tired not having to stay up until 10:30 anymore and being free of washing the parts day in and day out. 

I fell asleep sometime around 9:30, I think I went down just because I could.  At 2:37 I woke up.  4.5 hours until Nathan was to wake up and eat, I tried to make myself more comfortable.  Changed into a tighter top and carefully adjusted things and tried to relax and go back to sleep.  I had the internal struggle playing in my head, get through tonight and tomorrow won’t be as hard, I waited and waited the pain and the weight was winning.  At 3:10 I got up and pumped, 10 oz in 5 minutes.  No wonder I was in pain!

I am sort of at a loss at this point, I know its early but I am just the same.  I was pumping for 10 minutes, a few weeks ago I cut it to 5, night before last I went for 3 thinking that I would be cutting back the supply and the discomfort would be minimal.  Now I think I may end up doing  the 3 minute pump for a week or so and try again.  I really wanted to be done with this before our trip next week, I don’t want to haul the thing with me, I don’t want to have to do the “dishes” in a hotel sink.  I want to be done so I can go to sleep when I’m tired, not staying up for pump time.   I knew this was going to be hard though.  This supply is such a mixed blessing, every adjustment is painful.   This plays with the emotion involved in weaning as well, if I just keep nursing it won’t hurt, if I just get the weaning over with, it won’t hurt.  GAH!  You know that its hard in the beginning, nobody told me about this part.

4 thoughts on “Night One: Fail

  1. I hope you have better luck with Night Two. Some girls at work were talking about it just yesterday, so at least you’re not alone. It’s a hard thing for everyone to get through.

  2. Weaning is hard – emotionally and physically. When you get engorged try just expressing enough to bring you a bit of relief and then stop. You will be messy and still full feeling and yes, it will still hurt a bit but after a few days your body will adjust.
    I weaned my DD at 8 mo. I was just done but I cried and cried when I knew it was the last time I was going to nurse her. I was starting to no longer enjoy it and I knew it was time. I wanted to end on a positive note so I could look back and feel happy that I nursed my babies. Then it was painful for a few days, I expressed what I needed to – usually tried to just hand express a bit – and then it got better. Good luck!!!!

  3. I had serious “nipple” issues so I never really went through this stage. However, my girlfriend was an awesome breastfeeder and her daughter ended up weaning her own darn self! I don’t believe she ever pumped either. GAH! I know it’s not helping.

  4. Good luck with this – Weaning was so painful, I gave up once, and just pumped all the time even though I knew I couldn’t even give it to R. Strength to you.

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