A few days ago while Nate was napping I decided to get out my bins of summer clothes. While sifting through everything and saying hello to some of my favorite pieces I decided it was time.
I dug to the bottom of the one with the swimsuits, dug some more, 3 bikinis, sarong from Jamaica (forgot how cute it is!), wait… dig, dig, dig,, where are my…….. Oh my holy hell. It hit me like a ton of bricks. When Mike and I moved from NC to OH I was in really good shape, running and lifting weights several times a week, every week (ohh the time you have before you birth a kid!) I threw away every single one piece I had, 3 of them, good ones, J Crew* and cute. I THREW THEM AWAY? Why? We were on the verge of becoming pregnant, I knew this day would come. Evidently I was suffering from optimistic body image and thought that my midsection would always look so good. It was by the way, the only part of my figure I ever really accepted. The one spot that never got fat or rolly, all of that mess was saved for the pear region and the wing span. Now, of course now I have this flesh that refuses to snap back- well if we are being honest its not like I have forced my hand on the issue, as I wipe cookie crumbs from my lap… however, I am without a suit.
You know what is worse that putting on a bathing suit for the first time postpartum? Trying them on in FLORESCENT LIGHTING. I am bound to faint.
* j crew suits are worth it! They last and last and fit wonderfully. No pilling on the butt from sitting on the edge of the pool, no chlorine fade. They rock!