13 Things

So, The Blathering! I’ve been sad for years about never being able to go. The first year was before Style Lush and I just didn’t really know anyone or feel confident to just jump on in so I stayed home and was a sad panda. Last year I was pissed, it was in Chicago, I could have driven, but, I was too pregnant. This year I didn’t think I could go, I mean, I actually own a money tree, it’s 5 foot 3 4 inches tall, son of a bitch has yet to produce. But turns out my husband understands that time away is good for all of us.  So, 13 things you should know about me by Friday.

1. I’m a dork, as in, I get too excited and then try to contain myself and not look like a dork and that pretty much backfires and I look like a fool. I’ve been told it’s cute, I think people lie to me.

2. I’m an I love you drunk. This is important as I plan on drinking my weight two days in a row. This is good though, I will be more relaxed and less of the dork but with more touching.

3. My attention to detail is sort of ridiculous. I will notice everything you’re wearing and if I like it and look, lets assume I have  drink im my hand I will probably be fondling your bracelet or asking about what color of eyeshadow you’re wearing. I promise I wont ask to try on your shoes, though , lets face it. I want to. Please, don’t let this make you uncomfortable.

4. I already like you. So don’t be nervous around me. It’s true, I read your questioner and you’re rad. Take comfort in the fact that I’m a little freaked out, too.

5. I have some issues with mental health and if you already read my blog you know but if you’re here in advance of this weekend, I was hospitalized in April for ppd and anxiety. It’s okay to talk to me about it if you want. I won’t bring it up but you can if you have questions.

6. I’m a oversharer (see #5) Hoo-boy, if childbirth or breastfeeding comes up….you might want to walk away.

7. I don’t watch much TV. I want to, I love TV but most nights by the time the house is clean and the kids are down I’m shot. I wish we could talk about (insert your fav show here) but, I’m not that girl. I do watch every episode of The Soup and The kardashians, so feel free to judge just how I allocate my free time!

8. I talk about how much I work out, tweet about boot camp and my personal trainer (and his smoking hot bounce-a-quarter-off-me-please ass) But I don’t (yet) LOOK like I workout this much. It’s a process…..I’m still rather bottom heavy.

9. I’m really concerned about how my name tag may ruin the vibe of my outfit.

10. Sometimes I drink too much caffeine and my forehead and eyes really get the message. I look very surprised when this happens. Like I had reverse Botox and cannot relax… yeah, that’s just my face.

11. I live in Ohio, have been married for 9.5 years and have two kids. Nate 4, Ben 1. I’m going to miss the crap out of them.

12. I cannot wait to sleep in a bed all by myself. For TWO nights! Really, I’m looking very forward to this.

13. I used to have a bulldog name Bruno and he had a voice and likes and dislikes. Like, black t-shirts, cowboys and sharks. Dislikes, the UPS truck and chainsaws. He lived to be 10, this was “a thing”… so there’s a little peek into my crazy head.

Day after tomorrow! DAY AFTER TOMORROW!  I think I need a margarita primer….

Simple

There is a huge pile of mail in front of me, a pair of socks on the dining room table next to a pile of crap. Laundry baskets are full of both clean and dirty laundry, dishes are in the sink, raisins on the floor. Ben is walking around in a onesie. I worked out this morning but havent showered yet.

Sometimes, and lately most times, it’s not important. I’ll clean up in a little bit and tomorrow the same messes will appear. And then I’ll do it again. Dishes, laundry, workout, cook, it all happens. Over and over and over.

I get up everyday with purpose. To do what I can. Somedays I surprise myself with how much I can, others, I do just what is needed. Both are good days.

I see the kids playing together and there is a wonderful non-leaking roof over our heads and a man who adores the ground we walk on working away from his desk to provide all of this for us and that is what matters.  This family. We  have what we need and lots of things we don’t.

I wasn’t sure that this would be the life for me. Staying home and raising kids, boys. I wanted to try it though, before I outsourced the job. A blessing, one I don’t take lightly. And it turns out this is the life for me. One that I am good at on days I allow myself to see that. That I take care of the boys (small and big) and myself and our home and I’m doing it all pretty well. Even if the dishes aren’t done until after dinner. We have dishes and food to serve on them and warm water in a tub with clean pj’s, books to read and beds to call our own. And it’s all so simple and when I stop and pay attention. It’s all I need.