Too tired to talk

You guys, the baby still doesn’t sleep. He will be 10 months next week and he is still up every 1-3 hours, all night, every night. I’m haggard.

I think about blogging several times per day. I miss it.  I have lots to share with you around the house, too.   I’ve never shared Ben’s room, Nate’s big boy room, our bedroom and bathroom are almost finished and so is the kid’s bath. This weekend we are getting new carpet in the basement, we have new furniture down there I’ve not shared.  Then there is the playroom. Basically, what I’m saying is I may not be sleeping but my house doesn’t show it. I have no idea how I’ve accomplished a damn thing to tell you the truth but I guess having projects help the time pass until I can lie down. I miss my bed, I miss sleeping in it. I spend most of the night in a rocking chair.

I’m trying to fix the baby. crying it out isn’t working for our situation. I did it with Nate when I took his paci away at 18 months but that was just at the initial put-down, it wasnt all night long. Ben’s issue is all night long. I just can’t force myself to watch the clock and go in at 5 min 10 min 20 min in the middle of the night when I can just pop a boob in the kids mouth and he’s out in 15. I just ordered the no cry sleep solution per my ped’s suggestion and a friend said she had great luck with the baby whisperer. something’s got to give. I need sleep.

My in-laws arrive this weekend and after that I think we are in the clear for a while with guests. I hope to be writing more regularly. Even if it’s just to talk about how tired I am because sometimes just writing about it can make me feel a little bit better.

With both feet

Life handed me a 5 lb box of lemons a few weeks ago. I love lemonade but hot ham, that’s just too many lemons.

Our sump pump broke and put a few inches of water in our basement. Our insurance money has just come through, we have a bit to replace including the carpet. The basement is uninhabitable right now and it houses our main living areas, the family room, gym and the playroom. Massive bummer.

The hard drive on our dvr crashed and we lost everything! Around 100 recordings, full seasons of my favorite shows that I’ve fallen behind on. Tons of decorating shows that I watch while running. All of Nate’s favorites including holiday episodes that are no longer available. It was emotional. I had 28 Greys Anatomy! I don’t know when on earth I would have had the time to catch up but damn, I wanted to.

My uncle died. He had been ill for 8 years. For a while we thought he would be coming to live with us for a few months to be close to a hospital that could help him. Sadly he started rapidly declining and that never became an option. The kids and I rushed home (Seattle) for about a week to be with family and attend his service. It was awful and beautiful and I’m so glad we were there. Traveling with them alone went quite well save for how damn hard it is to carry everything. I’m still sore.

The kids continue to fill me with love while simultaneously sucking the life right out of me. Nate’s in some sort of jet lag hell where he cannot fall asleep until after 10pm, meaning I’m trapped in his room until then. He’s afraid of the dark just enough. He’s in shit-tastic moods lately, too. I’m afraid that’s mostly his age and we will be here in this stage of mom knows nothing and I want what I want right this freaking second. He’s also in a stage where he wants to hold my hand all the time and he will hold both sides of my face when he gives me kisses and he is just delicious. Ben is on the move, has 3 teeth and is cutting 5 more. He gave me a break last week and only got up once a night to nurse but now it seems that the 9 month sleep regression is here and he was up every 90 minutes last night. EVERY 90 MINUTES! Y’all, I die. I had no idea you could be this tired and still be alive. Ouch.

I singed into weight watchers this morning after a few weeks of not tracking pts. I gained 1.4 lbs while I took a break which is totally no big deal but I know myself. I need to get back on track before the train completely derails. So, back to it today. 10 lbs to go.

The weather is changing. It’s been raining and warmer (it is supposed to snow 2 inches tonight but that should be the last of it) and as I always do this time of year I feel myself changing with the season. As tired as I am I’m really busy with house projects and plans. It feels good. If only I could get a few hours of sleep…

Mom comes next week for 10 days. I plan on “using” her to the fullest. We have a few projects planned, painting my bedroom and bathroom.  I’m excited to have her here.I’m also really freaking excited to go on a date with my husband. Grandmas make for the best babysitters you know. And since the boys were just at her house I know we will be one big happy family as soon as she gets here. There’s just something about the smell of your moms chicken soup in your own house. I can almost smell it already.

How are you? Its been so long!