Life goes on

Suddenly life is feeling like a whirlwind!  Our normally quiet two-person existence has been shaken up a bit.  This is due to tons of things, issues with the house, issues with our car, a too short trip to NC, lots more communication with everyone in our lives now that the baby is coming.  It’s been both crazy and really nice.  I think all of the activity is helping me keep my mind off the fact that something is inhabiting my body.   I’m okay with this but it is getting bizarre.  When we were in NC this weekend we received or first baby related gifts (thanks girls!) and they are all soft and sweet and I love it all but I couldn’t help but say out loud, “what am I going to do with this stuff”.  J laughed, as she knew exactly what I meant and how I am feeling, pregnant but not quiet expecting a baby.  When we came home on Sunday I carefully unwrapped all of the items and put them in the baby’s room, I called M into the room to look.  “There are someone else’s clothes in there, can you believe it?”  He looked at me like I had two heads,  “yeah, well we are having a baby” HA, easy for him to say!  I didn’t think he would “get” it before I would.  Funny considering the look on his face when that clear blue easy read Pregnant.  Last night our nursery furniture was delivered and as excited as I was for it to come when they were brining it in the house I again said out loud “wow, were totally having a baby”  (I wish I didn’t say totally but I totally did) Again he smiles at me and says “Yup!”  Later when everything was in place I rocked in the chair and stared at the crib, smiling yet shaking my head in disbelief.  I keep coming up with things that I think will help, at first it was the ultrasound (s) that helped for a few days, then hearing the heartbeat, Okay both were awesome but didn’t really do it.  Now I am saying that when it starts kicking that will help, but who knows.  I’m not feeling bothered by it I just think its sort of strange.  Something I wanted so badly is happening and I just can’t wrap my head around it.

Our trip to NC was fantastic, we saw everyone who we have been missing.  It was sort of a strange trip, like we were going home but not home at all.  M said the night before we left its “our home” its where we moved together and started our life with no friends and no family and we were going back to visit the life we had made for ourselves.  Still, renting a car and driving to “work” is so strange.  It was different than when we go home to Washington, which is home because our families and childhood friends are there.  This was it’s own experience and a sad one at that.  I couldn’t wait to move away from there, NC was beautiful and I had made some great friends but it never felt like home and I was desperate for a place that did (without actually being WA).  Going back and seeing everything we left behind was hard but reminded me that we made it there we will make it in OH too! 

Homeownership has been giving us a run for our money in the past few weeks!  We have been having power surges for about 12 weeks, which isn’t only annoying its been scaring the pants off of us.  See, we have a carbon monoxide and natural gas leak detector and when the power surges in the middle of the night the alarm sounds, the first few times it did this we were sure our house was about to blow, why else would it go off?!  Well long story short, the power company put a monitor on the house for a week and swore nothing was wrong, the day the monitor was removed we lost power to half of our basement, the half were we live, so our cable, internet and telephone were all out of order.  The next day they came back and again, said everything was fine. To make matters worse, the dang alarm went off that night at 2 am!  So we are livid, this dang $100 device we purchased to protect us is driving us mad and the power company has blown out our power and is taking zero responsibility!  Well, I feel compelled to remind you we are rookies in this homeowner business, after much tinkering and advise seeking we tried every test/re-set button in the house and bingo- its back!  I don’t even care how stupid we are, I was just so relieved that we didn’t have to call an electrician!   Actually the fact that the power co. didn’t ask me about the reset buttons when I called to report the problem makes us less dumb, right?   With that and the trip behind us I hope this week will be more relaxed, I’m told there is a baby coming and ho boy just wait for that tailspin! 

If I want your opinion, I’ll give it to you.

 Okay it’s no surprise or secret that a protruding belly is just begging for advice and horror stories.  This couldn’t be truer of the men in my office.   Since I have come out with my news at work the stories come about two per day.  Some are down right hysterical and others?  Not so much.  I have heard about it all.  “My Mom ate a banana split everyday for 40 weeks and I was 12 lbs, DON’T eat banana splits” That one is my favorite, it’s entertaining and has some great shock value.  Holy S! You were 12 lbs? Note to self, No banana splits!  YIKES!  I get more advice about what to eat and what not to eat than I need; it’s like the diet police around here. I eat very healthy, I have even been asked, “ do you get a lot of gas, you eat a lot of fruit everyday?”  Well thanks for noticing but ummm??  I would have expected that from an office full of mothers (well except the gas question), not from 28 men!  I am asked if I’m making it to the gym, reminded that I’m not really eating for two, are you in maternity pants already,how much weight have I gained. (rude?) Then, there are the men who think its nothing!  Oh I have seen it all, just a few snip snips and they sew it all up (hand motions and all) a couple sits baths and you’re good to go.  Another, “Your husband doesn’t want to hear you bitch about the pain, just push and shut up about it!”  He swears he’s quoting a friend, I doubt it after the tuna incident.  Tuna man also says “Your carrying low, it’s a girl”.  Well genius have you ever seen a 14 week belly high?   Don’t get me wrong there are some that are really sweet, ask me how I am daily and one in particular who makes sure I don’t need him to grab me a bite when he goes out for lunch.   It’s the ones with the ass-vice that get to you.  Day in and day out, asking what’s for lunch, what did I just buy from the snack machine (I love it when I disappoint and reveal a granola bar or peanuts) or how many trips to the bathroom does that make.  I guess I’m just not used to so much attention, good or bad.  I always appreciate being asked how I am feeling and I really love it after someone remembers I have had a doctor appointment.  It’s just the other stuff.. makes me curl my lip a little.  Maybe it’s the hormones; maybe I’m really paranoid about the weight gain, maybe both.

Now all I need is some sun!

I am feeling very well lately, nearly back to my old self except for the tiredness.  The cold wet weather really adds to just wanting to stay in bed or nap on the couch. It’s not like the tired days of your early 20’s were you were up till 3 and have to be at work at 8, it’s more like I’ve been up since 20 and haven’t slept in 9 years!  Like zombies have invaded my body (and force fed it fast food) and they just sort of push me around so I end up in the right place.  If only they could do my work for me, and switch out the burger for a salad.   Actually, my eating habits are much improved from the earlier days.  I am back to balanced meals and not living on crackers and pudding.  I am sure I will never want a snack pack again.   My goal for this week is to take the gym more seriously.  I was running about 15 miles a week before I got pregnant,  I have been to the gym only a hand full of times in the last 10 weeks.  I need to go, I will feel less inhabited by zombies and I really want to stay in some sort of shape so taking off the weight will be less of a struggle in the end.   

If someone would have told me how fast your body starts changing I wouldn’t have believed it.   Truth is, before you even know your pregnant there are visible things happening,  you just don’t put two and two together until that 2nd pink line appears.   In week 12 my belly rounded out, now two weeks later I’m almost looking pregnant.    This is something I was looking forward too but its not been what I expected.  I have always had the upper hand with what is growing and the ability to stop it.  Now I look in the mirror and I don’t recognize my own body.   I have 26 weeks to grow, like it or not.   I can work out and I will still GROW for 26 more weeks.  While I really am okay with that and look forward to everything that is waiting for me in the upcoming months,  I am hoping the more obvious the belly becomes the less self conscious I will feel.   I really need to work on feeling is less give a crap- why should I care if the check out person thinks I have a beer gut.  I know better, that should be enough.

Overall though, life is getting easier.  The housework is kept up with, the meals are homeade, Mr. B walked.  Now if the weather would get it together I could get the yard in shape while I can still bend over.

We are headed to NC for a long weekend Friday morning.  At least I know I can get some sun while there.    Guarenteed sunshine and love from our friends we left behind.  That will get me through the week of grey skies and naps!  Can’t wait.

Slacker

Because I have been so lax about updating I offer a list of random thoughts to keep you busy until I can gather up the energy to write something better.

• I need a haircut! Better yet I need a hairdresser.  My last haircut was less that good and I always say I would rather gain 10 lbs then have a bad cut as I could loose the weight before it would grow out.  Well now I’m up 7 lbs AND have bad hair…

• This weather is sucking the life right out of me- I want spring back!

• All of my fat/early pregnancy clothes were purchased in the week of 80-degree temps- I have nothing to wear when it is 40!  I do not look good.

• Having meatball subs for dinner tonight… *checks watch, 3 hours till dinner!*

• Pregnancy is messing with my skin, My face is clear, better than it has been in years, all of my adult acne has migrated to neck and back- THAT is something no one tells you about.

• This past weekend was very productive- I cleaned and cleaned and cleaned.  It was fantastic!  I even stayed awake until 11 pm!  Eleven PM- that hasn’t happened since January. 

• Most of the nursery furniture is in, I can’t wait until it is in the house and I can sit in the rocker rather than on the floor.

• About 85% sure that I want to find out the sex of the nugget.  I want to know if my hunt for a middle name for a pink nugget is a waste of time, or not. 

• The more I look at crib bedding the more I hate ducks, chicks and bears- my word isn’t there a stylish modern option for less than $600?   This is part of the reason I am leaning toward “finding out”.

• I noticed an older man at the coffee shop this morning look at my belly, then he made eye contact and smiled.   I liked it! 

• My tailbone is aching about 15 hours a day and when I workout (ha, walk an hour on the treadmill) it spreads to my hips.  I imagine I will gain a good 15-20 more lbs I’m in trouble!

• I went to Babies R Us by myself last weekend and it gave me a headache.  I love options, but having 47 baby monitors to choose from is just stupid!

• I have picked out a diaper bag; I’m so in love with it I wonder if I can use it as a purse before the nugget comes.  I know better, Petunia Pickle Bottom isn’t a handbag brand! It sure would hold all of my snacks…

Daydreamer

I’ve always been a daydreamer.  Could always sit quietly and just think of whatever comes to mind.  I have been doing this more and more in the past week or two.  I imagine it’s a combination of a few things, I am starting to feel better and the weather is finally spring like which lends itself to gazing out the open window. Another is the nursery, we started trying for a baby when we moved here so that room had its purpose from day one.  In the months that we were unsuccessful I would sit in the room and cry as it would go on empty for another month, in the in-between times I would sit in the corner full of hope and joy planning for the future.  Now I sit in the room and just, daydream.  I think about everything in that empty room full of promises from simple things like names and paint colors to deeper more important things that I’m sure I will write about later.  But right now sitting quietly suits me fine.  I am enjoying my quiet time dreaming up all sorts of plans, on the deck with Mr. B at my side or in the baby room next to the open window.  I’m finding that all of this is sinking in and as it does I am more and more content and increasingly excited.

Edit:   I wrote this a few days ago, tonight its snowing so those days of sitting in the fresh air of an open window are on hold!   *shakes fist at Ohio*

All bets are off!

I complained the other day about heating food at work.   It is one thing to heat something up with the intention of enjoying and eating it.  I understand that, it’s cool.  It is my problem that I am super sensitive to smells right now.  It is QUITE a freaking other to open a can of tuna, choose to partially drain it into a paper towel, stash said paper towel in my desk drawer and hide the can of tuna under my desk!  WHY would someone do that?  Apparently my dry heaving fit over the halibut soup wasn’t funny enough.  Is that not mean am I missing the humor here?  It may have been funny if it were a few weeks from now when my stomach turning days are (hopefully) well behind me, but not today.

 

They can’t all be the best

Well first off, one of you had to have read yesterdays post and laughed.  She’s so not ready for Chili, Rookie!  Well you’d be right. Why didn’t someone warn me?  Lordy did it come with some serious indigestion.  It wasn’t a very good recipe either.  It sounded good because it had chipotle chilies and adobe sauce which I have cooked with before and they were awesome (barbecue chicken sandwiches, very different flavor than chili).  I’m skeptical before I dish mine up so I put massive amounts of cheddar on it to try and help it along.  Sill wasn’t great.   M takes his first bite, “this isn’t your regular stuff, it’s different”.  I ask “good different, bad different?”  “Well, sort of tastes like a campfire.”  Well that settles that!  The mini cornbread muffins were great I will post that later.

Today’s random thought:

Why is there non-acetone nail polish remover?  It’s like trying to remove your polish with a cotton ball and sheer will! 

p.s. My gym bag is in the car. Wish me luck!

I’m Back!

Okay, I’m a little reluctant to say that I am my old self but this weekend was great.  I needed rest between tasks and still went to bed on the early side but I was well, I was vertical!  When asked on Friday night, “Can you eat?”  I not only answered, “Yes,” I said “lets go out for Mexican!”    On Saturday I went out on my own for the first time in at least 7 weeks.  My mission, to find pants that aren’t screaming for mercy every time I sit and or eat- god forbid I do both simultaneously.   I still don’t look pregnant but my middle has gotten thicker so it was time.  I was able to find two pair of pants that fit and look good but the tops were a challenge.  Because I’m just thick, not round yet the maternity tops are just tent like so I had to buy some larger regular stuff that I can hopefully get some use out of once the little nugget is here.  But the best purchase by far was the red t-strap sandals!  LOVE!  Oh it has been ages since I have bought a pair of shoes because I want them.  Now, some of you are laughing because I need shoes like I need air.  However, my job is so casual I just wear jeans, plus the winter here is so cold and wet/snowy that I just wore clogs and thick socks so it really has been a good 6 months since my last good impulse shoe buy.  That made the day!   Then, well then I was shot I had to go home and eat my left over chimi from the night before and take a nap.

Remember the winter comment I just made, cold and wet and snow?  Well Ohio isn’t done with my initiation just yet.  It’s been very nice for a while now, the trees are blooming the grass is green.  Tomorrows high 80.  Thursday’s high? 38with a chance of SNOW!  Snow, I’m sorry? You have got to be kidding me with this back and forth business. Snow Thrusday thru Sunday.   I doubt I can even get my warm coat zipped up. Oh how I miss North Carolina’s weather!

Okay, next up on my little rant is food at work.  What can rock a pregnant persons world faster than the word twins*?  The guy at work who heated up Halibut soup today!  This is one symptom that has not subsided, the smells can still get me and holy crap did that do it. I mean who has even heard of such a thing?  Their needs to be rules about what can be micro waved at work.  #1 FISH- #2 FISH!  Gag!  Now if you will excuse me, I have new recipes to try tonight, one for Chili and another for mini cornbread muffins!  YUM.  I can’t tell you what a victory it is to cook again.  Next up, getting back to the gym…  Maybe tomorrow.

  * Oh god no, there is just one!